|Sunday, 14 July 2003
I don't know what to tell you or how to tell it, but I know I've to tell it to you and I know you will understand me… On Friday I was at this party. In the beginning the atmosphere was quite comfortable and the mood was cheerful , almost too cheerful!
Everybody was very happy, because it was the first weekend of the summer-holidays and the most of us looked forward to six weeks full of fun. We talked, laughed, giggled, danced and had much fun. The music was great. Of course we also drank so much alcohol as usual. Up to this point everything was as usual. But than something indescribable happend…
I would tell it to you if I was able to, but I am not. I am not able to speak about it by now. In fact it was no big deal. I want to forget about it. I will forget about it! The time will does its work … Grandma always says: “The passage of time allows deep scars and pains to heal.” Grandma is always right. I should forget about that stupid party! Rachel and Nicole will calm down soon.
Wednesday, 17. July 2003
I phoned Rachel. Wanted to talk to her, but she said she will never speak a word to me again… I do not understand. I thought we were friends. What should I do? She is not only angry. She is furious! She cried at me like a mad and I had no chance to say a single word. In fact she didn't want to hear me! She just told her opinion to me and hanged up the phone. I phoned her once again and asked her for a opportunity to speak, but then I couldn't find the words. My throat was sealed (= verriegelt/ verschlossen) and mucilaginous (= verschleimt).